Hers birthday

Last time, October will be a very significant and happy month for me. All the people I consider important to me are celebrate their birthday in that particular month. Usually I will spent two weeks searching present here and there to make them happy and my present will always be the best for them. I used to think myself very lucky to have them in my life. I used to think I will remain the good relationship with them whole my life. But yet, I realize, nothing remain the same forever, including friendship. The first one , she is my good friend, we knew each other since very small, we used to go practice together, hang out together and planning to skip training together. Our friendship was so pure and we never give and set our friendship in any particular group like “good friend”, “best friend” , “ordinary friend” stuff like that, we just friend. And where ever we met, we will walk together and stick together until one of us off. The friendship was without any pressure, and I feel calm to have a friend like that. She is the one who made me has the culture of : <>. I still remember she used to bring along birthday cake driving hers motorbike in the rainy night coming to my home celebrate my birthday with me and my family. Although the party was quite simple, but it mean a lot to me. The friendship changes a bit after she went to KL to study. We didn’t SMS each other, we didn’t talk to each other and we didn’t hang out together anymore. I kind of forget the feeling because I never thought of it and realize it. Maybe I should say... The friendship will still the same even we don’t contact each other, because we never treat each other like very special best friend. After all, when meet up, we will just talk and if got nothing to talk, is ok, no big deal!! We won’t feel sad, we will just wonder why. And now, we don’t celebrate birthday together anymore. I will just sent a SMS to her wishing her and she usually never reply...hah, such a naughty gal The second birthday gal, we met when we were in form six, our friendship started at my birthday, she phone me wished me happy birthday and we continued our conversation from daily life to religion belief , I can’t remember how long we actually talking on the phone at that night, but for sure, it was more that three hours. Just imagine, two people from different culture and background talking on phone for the first time and it took so long for them actually to stop talking. What should I call it? Fate? Or we just meant to be friend. Blah blah blah, we started to become good friend then later became best friend; she was my very first best friend who I really care of. We went through a lot of adventure. We climbed the small mountain together, we went fishing together, we went Malay kampong together, and we even went to kubur together (not the sense of die together, don’t misunderstand). She was the one who guided me to drive calmly and steadily, and I was the one who made her realize the fun of driving motor. She was the one who made me get used with English, and I was the one who teach her to speak and write in mandarin. She was my teacher for mm, chemistry, biology, and PA. She was the one who always beside me when I was down and unhappy. She is the one who gave me free medicine when I was sick. She was the one I used to hang out together till late of the night. And the most important, she was the one who made me felt so lucky to have such a great friend in my life. But yet, those all were not real. When came to the end, we were not friend anymore, our friendship came to the end. I wonder did she ever appreciate me? I guess she was, but not long. She used to tell me I was hers very close friend who can share everything together, and gave me all the promise that our friendship will never change even we went to different places. See what happen, the promise all became rubbish. I just can’t accept the point she gave me that I made hers life miserable, excuse me, is who made whose life miserable? Why she need to limit hers life with so called principal? And I can proudly tell you that, I never betray the friendship and I will always remember that she was the one who end up all the way for us to become friend again. I tried to behave gentle to her and she just can’t imagine how the thing she said to me leaves great sad impact in my life. I know perhaps me not the only one who suffer or sad but at least I let the world know how much I appreciate the friendship. I tell you, it was very stupid to let our own mindset change the friendship. Different pple, different view, if that was the decision, then I respect. Just asking urself, have I ever betrayed you? Have I ever point finger on you? Have I ever not at your side when came to any conflict? But u has to understand, something I just can’t accept. U has to respect me then. Our friendship have too much conflict , we both hurt each other by our own behavior, I assumed that we knew the fact, but something happen is happen, we will never become friend anymore, when I see her, I will have nothing at first, then the unhappy scene will later appear, look like the friendship have no back turn for us. Maybe one day I will forgive her and forget all the past, I just let the time cure .After all, is you change my point of view toward friendship. I pray so much, one day u will totally disappear from my memory. The third birthday person, she is everything for me. She is my idol, my maid, my lecturer and everything u name it. Let see... Have I ever celebrated birthday with her? Flash back…. Ohya, got! Started last few years, u see, is not me don’t want to celebrate birthday with her, but sometime…. Don’t want to give myself excuse. Ok... I was wrong. And this won’t happen anymore. As long as I have chance, I will gap all the opportunity to be with her. What were the present I ever gave to her? Hmm... For sure... Nothing except a birthday cake that myself also want to eat. I choose the flavor I like instead of choosing the one she likes. I am so bad. But every year in this particular day, I will tell her how much I love her and thank her for everything; I won’t feel shame or tongue tide when saying this kind of words to her... I feel proud and I know deep in her heart, she was happy to hear that. I just know that... hah... She mean so much to me, I should write a specific article bout her. I want to tell the world that, I love you so much and my life will really miserable without you. Hey, u guys don’t think I am a lesbian, she is my mum lah, and I am 100% normal. I can prove it. Hah. If one day I act badly to my mum, u guys can just screw me and hit me and slap me and kick me and whatever.. I should not do that to my mum... I love her. Love her so much. How many pages already I wrote? Eh... too long, actually got another one I want to write... I feel sorry toward her/he, I don’t know which of them birthday, but for sure is one of them, I assumed is her... so. I never celebrate birthday with her, if got, was also the time when she bought hers own cake back and asked we all to gather to sing for her. Why so sad one? Aiseh.if she did not, then I will just forget the day, u see, until now I don’t know what day is actually hers birthday, I only know the month. But she mean a lot to me also, she was the one who bought very nice, delicious, expensive cake for me every year, she is the one who take me to restaurant eat all the nicest food, and she is the one who always talk non stop this few years, who is she? She is my eldest sister lah, who else? She live at penang, but I never go visit her in this three years, the excuse I gave to myself is I have no transport mah. So she is the one who suppose to visit me. Hey, me very terrible lah, I should know when is hers birthday and give her a surprise, don’t u think so? I still remember that got one day, I phone her to just have a chat with her, but she assumed me got thing want to buy or want her do something for me. When I told her I just want to sembang with her, she was so surprise and told me that this was the first time me actually call her to talk to her. I am that bad one meh? I can’t recall also, I thought me is very nice person. But whatever lah, she should understand lah, we student very busy. I will still remember our future plan, I will try my very best to realize them k? Ok, time to stop, if not later Anna will screw me for writing nonsense things here, this page got its own objective and function, I know I know, but I also got lesson to teach from this article: 1. appreciate your family more than your friends, ( don’t repeat my mistake ) 2. remember all your family members birthday ,set a reminder in ur phone 3. friendship..hmm never put too much hope on it, it will eventually change 4. now I agreed with acad k member zi wei, he told me that comrade in faith will remain the friendship with you and better than other friend. ( anna lah) 5. It is the time for you to call back all your old friends to let them know u still alive. 6. Sensei once said that, the precious thing for youth is pure friendship, hopefully we all will be somebody to our friend and we are the one who should have good connection with people. 7. I realize that I should do my human revolution. Lady and gentleman do guide me.